BEAUTY KLINIC

If you′re a new Mom or Dad, perhaps you′ve begun to feel like you′ll turn into the Grinch if you hear one more sleigh bell ringing. For new families, the holidays mean not only keeping up with all of the celebrations and holiday festivities that your family and friends want to include you in, but also the round-the-clock parenting that your new precious baby demands. As a young parent, you may be feeling pulled between what you want to do and what your body and mind tells you that you′re capable of. Surviving the holidays as a new parent is a bit easier if you learn to strategize your time and efforts. Here’s some tips to help you get started managing your new family for the holiday season:

Let go of the images of the perfect holiday season. Everyone envisions a picture perfect Christmas season complete with the perfect tree, all the right presents for everyone on their list, guests that are filled to the brim with holiday baked goods, and other illusions that we are exposed to through television (or maybe even our own upbringing). Even without the added tasks of nursing, diapering, burping, changing, and trying to get in a few winks of sleep for yourself, the holidays can never compete with the images we’ve developed of this special time of year. It’s not reality.

Learn to say no, and don’t feel guilty about saying it. The holidays are notoriously synonymous with outings with friends and family. In a land called Perfect, you would still have the time and energy to do all of the things your family and close circle is accustomed to having you do or participate in, but chances are you are already overwhelmed with the rigors of adjusting to parenthood. You may have been going from just the two of you to a threesome, or you may have other children and the new baby is an adjustment to all of you. Either way, it’s going to take time to make the adjustments and feel comfortable with your new family unit.

Let your baby be your guide. Most babies need to have the routine and quiet that is never to be found at holiday gatherings. If your baby’s temperament is such that he or she doesn’t seem to care for the constant commotion of the holidays, then consider leaving an event early, or simply not attending.

Keep the lines of communication open with your partner. It’s so easy to get caught up in the love that you feel for your new baby and the hustling and bustling activities of the holiday season. Don’t overlook your partner - he or she may be feeling an equal or even greater amount of stress, pressure, and anxiety. Be sure to discuss each other’s wants, needs and expectations for the holiday as new parents, and make decisions that encompass a bit of both of your ideas.

Make a list of everything you need to do, separated into three categories - Musts, Shoulds, and Wants. In the Musts category, list everything that you absolutely must do (there is no way of getting around it); the Should category is where you list things that you feel pressured to do, but don’t necessarily want to do and the Want category is where you list the things you actually want to do. Pay close attention to the Wants category - it is important that you allow yourself to do some of the Wants for the holidays.

Take a decorating cue from the Mommy Muse. One year, I ended up putting the tree inside my baby’s playpen, instead of her. I put all of the gifts inside there, which looked so silly, but it was a workable solution. I wasn’t willing to go without my beloved tree. I needed to keep her safe. This was a way to do it and I was really glad. We only needed to do that for one year. Sure, all those fancy decorations are great for at least appearing to be in the holiday spirit, but don’t worry if you can’t go all out this year. If your baby is in the exploratory stages of crawling, it may be wise to follow do a bit of non-traditional decorating to keep baby (and your heirloom Christmas ornaments) safe.

Let your Christmas mouse do your shopping. With just the click of a mouse, you can have all of the gifts that you want to buy this year delivered to your home (either wrapped or unwrapped) without ever leaving the comfort of your robe and slippers. Not dragging your newborn out into the germ-infested malls in the freezing cold to dodge shopping carts and the lady that sprays you with perfume each time you pass the cosmetics counter is priceless.

Scale down your hosting duties. If you absolutely have to play host for a family gathering, ask each family member to bring a dish, and then simply buy a honey-baked ham or turkey from the deli to complement those dishes. Some new parents even choose to host just a desert bash instead of a full meal to keep some of the tradition of the family gathering without all of the work. Choose whatever works best for you and don’t forget to ask for help with cleaning up.

Nurture yourself. Schedule some time each day to relax, even if its just a few moments to read or have a quiet cup of tea. You will be better able to respond to your baby’s needs if you take time to “refill” your own well.

Tags: Babies, christmas, emotional health, family, holiday stress, Holidays, home, new motherhood, new parenthood, parenting, parenting resources, postpartum survival strategies, self help, Stress Management, wellness

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